Manusia

Manusia sanggup berbuat apa sahaja untuk meneruskan kehidupan masing-masing. Kita semua mempunyai gaya hidup dan taraf ekonomi yang berbeza. Sepanjang hidup kita, saya pasti kita semua pernah menipu seseorang demi keuntungan dan kebaikan diri kita. Begitu juga saya. Penipuan- penipuan seperti ini adalah logik jika kita banyak melakukannya sewaktu kecil kerana fikiran kita masih belum matang. Tetapi, adalah sadis lagi menyedihkan jika kita melakukan penipuan di saat kita sudah capai umur akil baligh. Ini adalah suatu perkara yang sangat kotor.

Saya faham kita semua mempunyai alasan disebalik setiap penipuan yang kita lakukan, tetapi saya tidak boleh menerima suatu penipuan itu sekiranya perkara ini dilakukan oleh individu yang dipercayai. Saya tidak dapat membayangkan bagaimana seseorang itu sanggup menipu orang yang dikenalinya sendiri. Lagi-lagi apabila orang itu besungguh-sungguh akan perkara yang diberitahu kepadanya itu.

Saya teringat sebuah kisah dimana seorang raja mengarahkan agar rakyatnya menghamparkan permaidani agar kakinya terpelihara, tetapi adalah lebih baik jika raja itu mengusahakan agar dihasilkannya sepasang kasut yang boleh dipakainya agar kakinya tidak kotor. Dengan cara ini, dia tidak membebani rakyatnya demi kepentingannya sendiri.

I had a chance to hug TOP hahaha..felt really warmth..he has broad shoulder too.He was wearing black coat and trousers. At that time we were at the airplane stair. What the...

Then, I felt like I'm in relationship with Lee Seungi as a lover, while Eun Shi Kyung is my best friend. Also like, what the.....

Ok,just feeling to tell this...hehe

Hidup ini hanyalah kerana Allah

Aku terfikir berapa peratus dalam hidup aku ni aku beribadah kepada Allah? Berapa peratus jugak segala macam masalah dan kerja yang aku lakukan ni semata- mata kerana Allah? Astaghfirullah al- Azim. Aku telah banyak lalai daripada mengingati Kau Ya Allah.

Berapa banyak kali aku menderhaka kepada orang tua terutama ibu bapa termasuk juga nenek aku dan adik beradik aku. Rupanya Islam telah mengajar kita cara yang terbaik dalam setiap perkara.
Segala perbuatan kita didunia ini, setiap saatnya akan di soal oleh Allah kelak.

Kadangkala aku lagi menitikberatkan hal-hal dunia sehingga aku memandang ringan hal-hal agama. Contohnya, aku lebih mengutamakan mendengar lagu sedap daripada solat di awal waktu. Siapa aku? Hanyalah hamba, sehinggakan sanggup menangguh ajakan Tuhannya semata-mata kerana benda lain.

Moga Allah terus memberi hidayah-Nya kepada kami. Amin

..and there it happened

The one that I really hate just happened, i don't know how to describe my feelings right now. Now, everything wouldn't be the same. I don't know it is a good thing or is a bad thing. Me, myself, I can't change myself to someone I'm not neither anyone else can. But what happened if someone who also difficult to change himself, wanted other people to change to the way that he can tolerate.

He knew I'm weak at talking
He knew I'm weak at confronting
He knew I'm nobody
He knew I'm useless
He knew my passion

But then he used all my weakness to CONFRONT me!!!
How sad can you imagine I feel.

The one that I always think of, to share the burden together so he can feel relief even for a second, the one that I ALWAYS THINK OF DAYS AND NIGHT to think of how to make things better, didn't even let me say a word.

The same things that you point the fault to me, is exactly the same things that you've done to me that I kept it silently in my heart, so that nothing can fall us apart.

Can you imagine how it would make me HURT by saying I HATE you.

It is not fair that you told other people about me when you didn't even know the truth.

When you already have tones of back up people, while me having none.

This is what you chose, I can't let you and I don't even want to beg you to stay, because I guarantee one day whenever you have problems at other place, you will remember the good things I gave to you. I hope you can get someone better than me, and not someone worst. But if you got someone worst, I hope you can learn everything is not always be perfect. Sometimes we have to sacrifice a little bit of our heart to get more. By just throwing away the heart, you just commit suicide.

I LOVE U

I : I LOVE YOU. Yes, you, no no, you, yes you...
M: Do I know you? or..do you know me?
I : I don't think you know me, but I know you. The only thing is I don't know you really well yet.
M: Oh, and so what make you like me then?
I : I don't know, since childhood I already like you. You did make me suffer A LOT when making decision whether to just stick on you or just give you up.
M : I didn't know that but I know I am popular nowadays, but I am really having high standards of qualification. Do you have all that?
I : I don't think I have that yet. But I'm preparing now. I should be more hardworking and diligent to pass your target. I know we can be together one day later but as for now, let me practice and learn a lot so I can treat you well. We can be partners.
M : Ok then, we'll see. Good luck.












p/s I= me, M= Medicine :P

10 How to make study interesting

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This Aid Holiday

For this time, I felt like it was a bit dull than before. I don't know why, the celebration and so..
But the best thing is my house-mate's mom came all the way from Madinah and I got to taste very yummy foods such as Rendang daging, nasi himpit, kuah kacang, fried meehoon, cucur kodok, nasi lemak and corn pudding. Her mother just left this morning back to Madinah.

And now welcome back to normal life, where all things we must prepare ourselves. As a student, I need to study right? But I don't like the way that people are pushing or forcing me to study. No one tell me so, but it is EXAM....While learning new things too, I kept remembering about the fact that I should remember something just because I'm afraid of questions that will be asked during exam. Plus, our doctors too when giving us lectures, will say something about exam for example "You must remember this by your heart because there will come out in the exam" " In exam, you should answer it like....." Exam here, exam there, exam, exam, exam, exam.

Can't we learn something because it is our interest? And no exam!!!

But what can I do when this world is based on EXAM. If you don't score, you'll not succeed. This is the world that I live in now.

I hate the fact that someone will get really focused when exam is just 1 week aparts. They will do anything by not eating, not sleeping, and all. But, after the exam, they will enjoy all their hearts out.
I don't wish to be like that.

I want to read because I wanted to know.
I want to read because I love reading.
I want to read because I feel books is my companion when I'm lonely.

But what are in my thinking is:
I want to read because I'm scared of exam
I want to read because maybe someone is struggling better than me
I want to read because I am stupid
I want to read because everyone scares me
I want to read because nothing else I can do

I hate the life on study weeks. Seems like it is worst than my normal life. Everyone will get stressed, moody, sacrifice everything out, mind and soul like nothing is more important than exam.

So, can exam be something fun? I really wanna know if there are any tips to make studying and exams fun. Let's google it now.

My feelings

I dont know why I'm supposed to feel this. It's not that I want something more but....ok, you describe this yourself.

First of all, my weakness is that I can't make others hurt because of me. It includes, the sacredness of being fooled or be-fooled. I know I am no one to be compared of others in public speaking or  to be friendly in fact that it is awkward. I'm not like that. It saddens me sometimes when I feel I am really less in this and everybody is looking down to me. If only they can read my heart, which is always thinking and working to make initiative to talk smoothly and bravery just like them.

I feel like I am a fool by just being quiet all the times plus my blurred looking face. I know they think I am weird and no fun at all. Really, it doesn't supposed to disturb me at all, because this is the way I am and I always be. I cannot change myself just to entertain others. Maybe I can, but only for a few moments. Then, I became myself back. Unfortunately, I do cared about these things and it annoys me very very very MUCH.

Sometimes I really care about someone and I am scared if I do something, it will make them sad, and so I sacrifice myself a little bit and felt so happy if it really helps them. Unfortunately, many times I experienced of being stabbed from behind by them, because they don't even care to consider me.

Actually what am I to this world? Getting used several times when I want to be kind to them. Getting mad at something that is not even my fault. Being wronged at times I am right. Being left at times I waited others. Being scold at times I be patient to them.

Argghhh I wish I can explain this in the exact story but I can't.

Yes, I know there are rewards for those who are patient. Patient is not easy nor is hard. Everyone who choose it, will get it.

May Allah will always be for us. May He guide us till the end. Amiin. :)

I hate...

I know certain times we can be happy and certain times we might feel sad, moody, angry, and so forth. These are all human's mood. Did we ever realized that this mood could always affect others? Yeah, I agreed.
Me, myself sometimes felt really angry that I cannot bother to think about others or look, be nice to others. I feel I just need my own space and time without any intruders.

But what happened if someone is easily getting mad and moody just with some tiny little things. What it will make you like? At a time you're really happy going out or bla2, suddenly someone pulled off his face just for example he cannot found his pen. Does that really make sense? No, absolutely no.

Then, the next 2 days again he is bad mood. I think by just his bad mood increasing my bad mood too. Haha. So, what can I do with this kind of people? Be patient. That's it. Because he is not our siblings or all but just our friend. If we tell them what is really wrong about themselves I'm scared that he will get mad at myself then. No, no I'm not going to let you to get mad at me. So, it is better to get mad at him inside my heart, not to let it out.

OK goodbye :)

Should i hope for it or shouldn't I?

I really wanna hope for that

But I hope I can't hope too high

I'm worried I might hurting myself

Let's just be the fate choose my way,

with Allah's guidance. Amin :)

Me, Him & The Bus

It was the best day ever. HOLIDAY time is coming and so many things were playing inside my mind thinking of what to be done when I reached my HOME SWEET HOME hehe. Every preparation is done for my journey to the west back home, including buying bus ticket and packing my belonging and also some "souvenirs" from our beloved teacher = TONES of HOMEWORKS.Fiuh ~ ~

At that time we need to go to the station bus which is situated at Teluk Intan, Perak, which is about 1 hour I think (argghh I cannot even remember this??WHY??) While typing this I just remembered that we used to find "kereta sapu" or just any car that functioned like taxi, illegally. Then, the car will bring us to the city's bus station. Then, we need to find a bus to go to Teluk Intan, which is the main station bus to go back KL.

Everything went smoothly, until at the time we need to enter the bus, suddenly, one of the bus worker told that mine and also my friend's tickets were not valid. We got the last 2 seats at the back, unfortunately the bus seats was less than it was supposed to be, maybe they got the wrong bus. So he told us to wait for another trip and we need to wait for an hour more. We were so disappointed and we can;t sit still as we were very worried of what will happen to us.

"Should we go back to our school?" "Is there any seats for us in the next trip?" "If not, where should we sleep tonight?" "Is my parents will be worried?" So many questions in our mind. But, it was not our fault. We can summon them if we want because they are the one who sold us the tickets but then no seats???What the...

Then, we waited patiently till the next schedule came. We were so anxious while entering the bus and sit at the last 2 seats at the back. We prayed so that no one will come and say to us, "Hey, that's my seat".

Suddenly my heart stop beating for a moment, after I saw someone. Then it accelerated abruptly. After a few second a 2nd cardiac arrest hit me. I didn't even told to my friend who I liked at school, so I just acted coolly as if nothing happened. 2 boys I admired were in the same bus with me!!!

At first the 1st boy entered the bus and sit a few seats in front of us. When the second boy came, his end mine's eyes met. He just happily greeted his friends and went to the back. I cant look straight to him - worried if it will be too obvious. Then he just bumped his body to the seat just in front of me. I was very happy that the person I stalked all the time is just right in front of me. Then he and his friends had some chats, which then lead him to change his seat (maybe he got the wrong seat). But inside my mind, why did he just sit there without even looking at the seats number? There were some points TO ME that he hinted that he liked me???haha...After he moved to his actual seat, then the 1st boy came to the back with one of his friend, to the seats in front of us.

I felt that all problems just now vanished as I saw them both. But, the reality was different. We were still anxious. We kept asking towards each other the question that we cannot answer it ourselves. What a fool. But, I just asking her loud enough to make the 1st boy hear everything we said. I can see him quite curious of what the thing we were talking about, but I didn't expect him to ask us.

But then, he gentlemanly ask us!!

1st Boy : I'm sorry to interrupt. But why are you so anxious about? (while looking at my direction)
Me       : Actually we have some problems. Our ticket bus is not valid. We were supposed to ride the
              previous bus but its seats was less than the tickets they sold. (nervously and rapidly)
1st boy : (blurred face) sorry2, I can't understand. (still looking at me)
Me       : (turned to my friend as if I said: You tell him then)
My friend: ............bla..........bla..............bla...........
1st boy : Oh, I see. Insya Allah, everything will be allright. Don't worry. (smile)
Us        : Yeah, hopefully. Thank you. :)

We were lucky because nobody came and admit that it was their seats.
So many things happened at that day, and it ended with a very very beautiful experience.
1st: can be in the same bus with my 2 crushes.
2nd: got a chance to have an eye-to-eye conversation with the 1st boy!!!

I can't never imagine that I can talk with him!!! Something sweet to be remembered if we are really fated to each other..

After the holiday, I just knew that both of them were being nominated as our school Student Representative.
And I wonder if he talked to us just because he wanted to show how caliber he can be as a leader. I don't know. I wish he is not that kind of person.

So, basically it was the 1st and the last time we talked to each other.

P/S: The 1st guy is someone I talked before (the "twin" of my 1st admire), the 2nd one is the person I first admired.

Im scared...

MY LONG LOST CRASH

It is normal right to have some crushes in our pathway. Ive got many types of crushes, and even there are some who when I rewind back, I did't know why I liked them.

Now, I wanna tell a little bit about someone I knew when I was in Form 2.

1st reason why I liked him : He looked like my other crush, and then I named him "kembar" or twin in English.

After stalking him about sometimes, here are his traits:
Introvert, but has leadership quality in him, handsome, kind, he was one of a top student in his batch, calm.

We even talked, which I think was really fated. I'll tell you later.

Even 2 of my best friends said that we really looked alike.

But, I think he is very famous. Even his fb friends reached 2000++."SIGH~"

Everyone will fall for him if they meet him. But, the best thing is I had fallen for him before he became famous and before I knew he is a genius.

Love. xoxo .

My now and my future,

I don't what will await me onwards,

But I'm enjoying this moment the best that I can,

Because this seconds will past just like that,

I wanted to be the best of me,

I'm really jealous of others,

Why I can't be like them,

But I think everyone is unique,

The world cannot have all person like me,

It is fair.

Whatever what will come,

I think Allah will lead me the way.

Thank you Allah for taking a very good care to us.

Midsem

Midsem is just near the corner. And I didnt studied everything yet. I'm a bit lazy lately. What to do?Just remember, no one can help me if I'm not helping my own self

Some HWAITING wishes from them kkkk

.

recent fav songs

1) Im in love - Narsha

2) Urban Zakapa - Drinking latte/ caffee latte (my fav drinks slurppszz)

3) Officially missing you (original by Tamia) but you MUST need to check out some cool covers from:

   i) Geeks (korean version plus pretty hot rap....chinca chowwa)

   ii) Jeyesslee (twins singing with very harmonically)


P/S: I really like this kinda songs. Very relaxing and sweet at the same time.

saliva rush

Keep HWAITING!!!!!!

I KNOW I CAN DO THIS

LET'S STRIVE FOR INFINITE EXCELLENCE

K, gotta chow now to prepare foe class <3 nbsp="nbsp" p="p">

Study booster

Feeling down

I wish I am still at home, dunking Hup Seng biscuit in Nescafe drink, accompanied by my grandmother, watching evening drama.

Yes I am homesick right now. I'm sick of the fact that I need to learn how to be friendly, independent and confident with the fact that I'm not.

Till when this boring life will go on? Does medicine is fated to me? I dont know.

May Allah ease my way because He is the only one I have right now here. No families. T___T